"Mad Men" season 5 spoiler alert!
Don Draper arrives at the headquarters of Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce's new client, Consolidated Orange Cone, to pitch ideas for an upcoming ad campaign.
As he heads in to the meeting, Don is suddenly plagued by misgivings about the proposed slogans:
"Orange You Glad You Went With Consolidated?"
"You'd Have To Have A Heart Of Stone Not To Love An Orange Cone!"
"The Hip Cone With The Now Kind Of Youthful Vibe For Today's With-It Roads"
"Think Of Them As The Hats Of Kooky Witches Who Promote Traffic Safety"
The presentation goes poorly and Sterling Cooper Draper Pryce loses the account. However, Don gets the last laugh, as orange road cones fail to catch on as a consumer item and Consolidated Orange Cone is bought out by National Pointy.
He should've pitched Snooki as a potential spokesperson. She's about the same shade of orange as the cones.
ReplyDeleteAnd about the same height.
DeleteBut twice as intelligent.
DeleteYou're being too generous.
DeleteOrange Cones are much more popular than the alternative Asphalt-Black Cones.
ReplyDeleteReally? I guess you never lived in a town with bright orange roads.
DeleteI don't know, I drive so fast all the colors turn to grey.
DeleteLet's not forget that Consolidated had ties to the Lithuanian People's Front and their terrorist campaign to topple the Lithuanian government by diverting petroleum away from the manufacture of traffic cones.
ReplyDeleteAh, Karl remembers the Lithuanian connection. Few others will. Too bad none of the cones in the photo display the L.
DeleteThose who forget history are doomed to re-cone it. Or re-gum it. Whichever comes first.
Delete