"A perfectly silly, genius idea" -- David Letterman

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Jack Hanna


It wasn't one of Jack's more successful guest appearances.

Somewhere between Columbus, Ohio and New York City, the monkey figured out how to open the van door.  By the time Jack pulled up at the Ed Sullivan Theater, the monkey, the cheetah, the vulture, the python, and the lobster were long gone.  




Thinking fast, Jack presented what he called "a rare orange-crested North American Kalter."  Announcer Alan Kalter gamely played along, even biting Dave and depositing something unpleasant on the stage, but the audience wasn't buying it.

This sad story has a moral: please, friends, monkey-proof your zoo vans.

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12 comments:

  1. AnonymousFebruary 29, 2012 at 7:17 PM

    Our photographer gets Impressionistic, showing the star of the show, the Gum, in the changing light, Monet-style. While below Jack Hanna shows off his newest Columbus Zoo acquisition, the flaming-haired Kalter, just cornered and trapped inside the Ed Sullivan Theater. Obviously the cackling Kalter's been tranquilized for this sidewalk appearance.

    Jan B.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Steve YoungFebruary 29, 2012 at 7:50 PM

      It won't do Jack much good to acquire the Kalter. If a monkey can get the van door open, probably Alan can as well.

      Delete
    2. AnonymousFebruary 29, 2012 at 8:53 PM

      Well, you have more faith in the Kalter's abilities than I do, though of course, I observe him from afar only. But I would have bet money on the Wendell who used to occupy Alan's "cage," to not only open the van door but drive the van, too.

      Jan B.

      Delete
  2. AnonymousFebruary 29, 2012 at 8:29 PM

    Hmmm looks like that lady is wearing a cheetah scarf and holding a python purse...maybe she had lobster for dinner.

    ReplyDelete
  3. AnonymousFebruary 29, 2012 at 8:54 PM

    "Wanna buy a monkey-proof van?" - David Letterman in "Cabin Boy," had I written it.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Steve YoungFebruary 29, 2012 at 10:11 PM

      "Yes! Name your price!" - Jack Hanna in "Cabin Boy," had you written it and had I given you notes.

      Delete
    2. AnonymousFebruary 29, 2012 at 11:26 PM

      That movie could've used your help.

      Delete
  4. David YoderMarch 1, 2012 at 2:52 AM

    This unfortunate situation reminds me of Jack Hanna's 1989 book, "Monkeys on the Interstate." Once again, Big Red saves the day.

    ReplyDelete
  5. David KazmierskiMarch 2, 2012 at 10:43 PM

    Everything I know about animal safety I learned from gum related blog sites. I don't know a lot about animal safety.

    ReplyDelete
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